this is my life now, so why should I sit about moaning, I should embrace it and learn to enjoy it.

sometimes when I see you two together, I can't help but to look and wonder, do they miss me? do they think about me? do they want to be the 'three' again? or is it just me. Is it just me that always wonders if you would actually bet there for me if I needed it. I guess we're all caught up in all our own lifes but well, I guess this is my life now. Looking at my little people I trust sheet from counciling and I have 2 people on it who are not family and frankly I don't even know if I trust them people 100%. It's hard to tell who I trust anymore. I don't even trust myself. I hate feeling like this. Sick off having a feeling off something being missing inside off me but I guess this is me now, this is how it has panned out. I didn't ask for this to happen, I guess it just did.

when while I stop feeling alone? when while I stop feeling like I am the worst off the worst. I actually hate myself. if you aren't one off them, you are nothing. Looks like I am nothing. Can't wait to move away and just be happy.